Powoli - MamySie.pl
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Powoli

— Nie widzę Cię, więc czy jesteś?

— Jestem. Może nawet bardziej jestem, gdy mnie nie widzisz. Oddycham wtedy, nasycam się powoli powietrzem. Nic nie mówię, by tylko chłonąć. Lekki dreszcz przechodzi mi po plecach. Czuję spojrzenie na sobie.  Obce, choć czasami jednocześnie przyjazne. Czy to Ty jesteś?


Jestem, drogi Czytelniku. Jestem tu cały czas.

***

— Nie piszesz, czekam.

— Dziękuję Ci za to czekanie. Piszę cały czas, ale część szkiców opuści szufladę, gdy sama do nich dorosnę, gdy się odważę. Cały czas myślę, zbieram wątki. Dla Ciebie.

***

— Inni piszą prawie codziennie.

— Wiem, ale tu się tak nie da. Każdy wpis to osobna historia.

***

— Czy to jeszcze blog?

— Myślę, że tak. Jeśli blog ma pokazywać jaki jest autor, to on mnie oddaje. Nie chcę rzucać słów na wiatr, zwłaszcza tych ważnych.

***

— Tak to Ty nie zarobisz.

— Nie wiem czy mogę. Nie tak musiałabym pisać, aby zarobić. Tak jednak lubię pisać. Wybieram to drugie. Przyjdzie mój czas. Teraz muszę się uczyć i patrzeć. I żyć pełnią realnie. Powoli. Ale dobrze. Z klasą i namysłem.

***

— Sprzedajesz się. Swoją prywatność.

— Zatem każda rozmowa jest sprzedawaniem siebie, kiedy tylko mówisz coś szczerze. Nie pokazuję swojej intymności. Pokazuję przemyślenia. Ten blog to wywiad-rzeka.

***

— Czekam na każdy wpis. Otwieram jak prezent w dzieciństwie.

— Dla mnie już to jest prezentem.


Dziękuję za dobre słowa i myśli. Potrzebne to i mobilizujące, by wracać. Od 18 do 22 maja biorę udział w wyzwaniu Uli z bloga Sen Mai, także na blogu pojawi się 5 nowych tekstów. Już dziś zapraszam. Następnie opublikuję wpisy zapowiedziane oraz te, o które prosiliście.

Marlena Bessman-Paliwoda
marlena.bessman@gmail.com

Jeśli podoba Ci się tekst, podziel się nim ze znajomymi. Dla mnie to jak zapłata za moją pracę :) Dziękuję!

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79 komentarzy
  • Justyna Skowera | elare
    Posted at 22:01h, 16 maja

    Dobrze że jesteś 🙂

  • Karolina | Żyj Kochaj Twórz
    Posted at 12:32h, 17 maja

    Czytanie Twoich wpisów zawsze nastraja mnie trochę melancholijnie, ale też daje radość ze świadomości, że są na świecie tacy ludzie jak Ty.

  • M.
    Posted at 14:31h, 17 maja

    Na Twoje wpisy warto czekać.
    Dobrze, że nie pojawiają się codziennie, bo nie byłoby czasu na przemyślenie ważnych tematów, które poruszasz.

  • M.
    Posted at 14:34h, 17 maja

    Czasem pisząc (mówiąc) zbyt wiele gubimy sens tego, co chcemy przekazać.

  • Marlena | Mamy się
    Posted at 00:07h, 18 maja

    Uwierz mi jednak, że z melancholikiem mam niewiele wspólnego. 🙂

  • Vandrer Uggle
    Posted at 12:30h, 20 maja

    Jeśli ktoś uzna, że Twój blog to nie blog, to… jest u pani. Piszesz genialnie, z namysłem i tak, że oderwać się od tego nie można. Zwłaszcza, że znalezione tutaj słowa są pokarmem dla myśli. Może i trzeba czekać dłuższy czas, ale potem człowiek rozważa w sercu dłużej niż teksty na większości blogów.

  • Marlena | Mamy się
    Posted at 22:45h, 20 maja

    Dziękuję bardzo. Dla zmotywowania będę to czytać.
    „jest u pani” – zahaczyłaś o podstawówkowe wspomnienia:)

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