
3 filmy o małżeństwie
„Trudno okazać miłość, kiedy nie ma ku temu motywacji. Ale prawdziwa miłość nie opiera się tylko na uczuciach, lecz na determinacji w okazywaniu życzliwości. Nawet gdy nie ma za nią nagrody.” Zapraszam na trzy filmy, w których tle można przyjrzeć się małżeństwu.
Czas karmienia piersią, zwłaszcza ten początkowy, kiedy spędza się na nim większość doby, sprzyja oglądaniu filmów. Wracam do starych filmów, oglądam te polecane przez znajomych lub te na szybko znalezione w sieci. Staram się je jednak oglądać inaczej – z pewnym kluczem interpretacji, z wyszczególnieniem określonego problemu.
1.
Kiedy mężczyzna kocha kobietę
When a man loves a woman, 1994
Przyznam, że po tytule spodziewałam się ckliwej historyjki miłosnej. Okazało się, że z tej historii można wiele wyciągnąć. Poznajemy szczęśliwe małżeństwo – romantyczna kolacja, prezenty z okazji rocznicy, w domu dwie córki. Sielanka. Potem widzicie jednak, że w małżeństwie – związku dwojga bliskich ludzi – można zakamuflować i ukryć największe problemy. Tak się stało z alkoholizmem żony. Warto obejrzeć, by ostatecznie zobaczyć czy małżeństwo przetrwa. Nie jest to wcale oczywiste.
– Nie znienawidź mnie. Bo wtedy umrę.
– Nie przyszłoby mi to do głowy.
– Zaczynam o czwartej nad ranem. Piję w toalecie, w garderobie, w pokoju dziewczynek, kiedy ich nie ma. Kiedy idziemy do samochodu, wiesz po co wracam na chwilę? Żeby cokolwiek zrobić muszę być na rauszu. Cały czas się boję. (…)
– Nie jesteś sama. Nigdy cię nie zostawię.
2.
Zatańcz ze mną
Shall we dance, 2004
Oglądałam ten film kilka lat temu i skupiłam się na… tańcu. Teraz jednak chciałabym Wam zwrócić uwagę na problem rutyny w małżeństwie. Mąż, który ma wszystko, potrzebuje czegoś, czego nie potrafi zdefiniować. Nie znajduje tego w małżeństwie. Znika wieczorami, a żona wynajmuje detektywa.
Rozmowa żony z detektywem:
– Jak myślisz, dlaczego ludzie się pobierają?
– Z namiętności.
– Nie.
– To ciekawe. Uważałem cię za romantyczkę. Dlaczego zatem?
– Bo potrzebujemy świadka w naszym życiu. Miliardy ludzi żyją na naszej planecie. Co tak naprawdę znaczy jedno życie? W małżeństwie natomiast obiecujemy sobie, że będziemy się o wszystko troszczyć. O dobre rzeczy i o złe. O te straszne i te przyziemne. O wszystkie. cały czas. Codziennie. Możemy powiedzieć: „Twoje życie nie umknie niezauważone, bo ja je zauważę. Twoje życie nie pozostanie bez świadków, bo ja będę twoim świadkiem”.
3.
Próba ogniowa
Fireproof, 2008
Młode małżeństwo ambitnych ludzi. W kryzysie. Kiedy już mają się rozwieść, ojciec męża przekazuje mu dziennik z zadaniami na czterdzieści dni. Ten czas ma uratować jego małżeństwo. Pytanie tylko, czy wytrwa. Dziwi mnie, kiedy ktoś mówi, że nie widział tego filmu. Pozycja obowiązkowa dla małżeństw – nawet nie raz, a wielokrotnie do obejrzenia.
„Uważaj na pasożyty. Pasożyt doczepia się do Ciebie lub Twojego partnera i wysysa z małżeństwa życie. Pasożyty przybierają formy uzależnień jak hazard, narkotyki lub pornografia. Obiecują przyjemność, ale są jak zaraza, która pożera Twoje myśli, czas i pieniądze. Kradnie Twoją lojalność i serce tym, których kochasz. Małżeństwa rzadko są zdolne to przetrwać. Jeśli kochasz żonę musisz pozbyć się wszelkich uzależnień. Jeśli tego nie zrobisz, one Cię zniszczą.”
„Kiedy mężczyzna chce zdobyć serce kobiety, uczy się jej. Co lubi, czego nie lubi, jakie ma zwyczaje. Ale gdy już ją zdobędzie i poślubi przestaje się uczyć. Jeśli wiedzę zdobytą przed ślubem porównamy do matury, mężczyzna powinien dalej się uczyć aż zdobędzie licencjat, magisterium i w końcu doktorat. To podróż przez całe życie, która wciąż przybliża jego serce do jej serca.”
„Trudno okazać miłość, kiedy nie ma ku temu motywacji. Ale prawdziwa miłość nie opiera się tylko na uczuciach, lecz na determinacji w okazywaniu życzliwości. Nawet gdy nie ma za nią nagrody.”
„Nie za późno prosić Cię, abyś się ze mną zestarzał?” – może Ty też możesz zadać to pytanie. Na nowo.
Film z tłem – cykl polecania filmów z różnej półki, kategorii i rodzaju. Filmów, które łączy tło, czasem na pierwszy rzut oka niewidoczne. W przyszłym tygodniu tematem przewodnim będzie ojcostwo. Zapraszam w piątek, tak, abyście na weekend mieli trzy kolejne filmy do obejrzenia.
Magdalena Rolnik
Posted at 13:36h, 19 wrześniaHmmm… chyba mam sporo do nadrobienia, bo znam tylko pierwszy film. I w zasadzie zapomniałam o nim, więc chętnie obejrzę ponownie. Super lista – w sam raz na weekend! Dzięki!
Marlena | Mamy się
Posted at 20:20h, 19 wrześniaZapraszam zatem za tydzień. W tygodniu także 🙂
Beata Redzimska
Posted at 08:02h, 20 września„Trudno okazać miłość, kiedy nie ma ku temu motywacji. Ale prawdziwa miłość nie opiera się tylko na uczuciach, lecz na determinacji w okazywaniu życzliwości. Nawet gdy nie ma za nią nagrody.” Bardzo madry i prawdziwy cytat, bo zakochanie, zauroczenie przemija, a zostaje codziennosc. pozdrawiam serdecznie Beata
Paulina
Posted at 08:26h, 20 wrześniaNie oglądałam 'Próby ogniowej’. Z pewnością nadrobię 🙂 Notabene, u mnie w ten weekend też jest o filmach 🙂
Justyna Witkowska
Posted at 09:34h, 20 wrześniapróby ogniowej nie widziałam – dzięki za podpowiedź, rozpadało się u mnie, więc kawa i film będzie 🙂
Oszczędna Szafa
Posted at 10:05h, 20 wrześnianie widziałam żadnego! muszę to nadrobić 🙂
Zielona Karuzela Kasia
Posted at 12:59h, 20 wrześniaZabieram się za trzeci film, właśnie teraz 🙂 dzięki za podpowiedź!
Rene O.
Posted at 09:09h, 21 wrześniaDla mnie najpiękniejszy film o miłości to Pamiętnik 🙂
Jenny
Posted at 10:38h, 21 wrześniaWstyd się przyznać, ale nie widziałam żadnego z tych filmów. Muszę nadrobić wkrótce zaległości 🙂
Klaudia Chrapko
Posted at 11:05h, 21 wrześniaUwielbiam dwa pierwsze filmy trzeciego nie oglądałam muszę nadrobić dzięki 🙂
Angelika
Posted at 12:33h, 21 wrześniaPróba ogniowa ! Super film szczerze polecam 🙂
daywithcoffee
Posted at 12:42h, 21 wrześniaDzięki za fajne tytuły, nie znam żadnego z nich i chętnie nadrobię 😉
Anna
Posted at 14:44h, 21 wrześniaNie znam pierwszego tytułu – chętnie po niego sięgnę 🙂
Ania
Posted at 17:03h, 21 wrześniaMiałam pisać o Próbie ogniowej 🙂 Nie widziałam dwóch pozostałych filmów, ale Próba ogniowa to świetny film 🙂
polaczkropki.pl
Posted at 17:14h, 21 wrześniaNie widziałam żadnego z tych filmow. Pierwsze dwa muszę koniecznie zobaczyć, ze względu na tematykę alkoholizmu, ktora mnie interesuje. Tematyka rutyny rowniez jest wazna kwestia w zwiazku z ktora trzeba walczyc. Dzieki!
Vandrer Uggle
Posted at 09:31h, 22 wrześniaPrzydatna lista. Teraz trzeba jeszcze męża namówić do wspólnego oglądania 🙂
Marlena | Mamy się
Posted at 01:35h, 23 wrześniaChętnie obejrzę. Dziękuję.
Marlena | Mamy się
Posted at 01:37h, 23 wrześniaRacja. Można go oglądać i oglądać. Odzyskuje się wiarę, że można wyjść z kryzysu.
Marlena | Mamy się
Posted at 01:38h, 23 wrześniaDaj znać co o nich sądzisz. 🙂
Joanna Sidelnikow-Brzozowska
Posted at 22:03h, 28 wrześniawidziałam wszystkie ! i polecam każdy z osobna. Może właśnie namówię mojego męża do wspólnego oglądania 🙂
Marlena | Mamy się
Posted at 06:59h, 08 październikaByły prowadzone badania, że wspólne oglądanie określonych filmów wpływa na pogłębienie relacji małżeńskich (i zmniejsza ryzyko rozwodu). Przygotowuję tekst o tym.
Zatem oglądajcie. Razem 🙂
3 filmy o macierzyństwie - Mamy się - Małżeństwo, rodzina, wartości
Posted at 13:11h, 11 października[…] artykuły z cyklu „Film z tłem”: 1. Małżeństwo, 2. […]
Najtańsza terapia małżeńska - Mamy się - Cel: Twórcze małżeństwo
Posted at 00:52h, 21 listopada[…] ZADANIE #2: Zaproś swoją żonę/męża do wspólnego obejrzenia filmu. Proponuję Wam, aby był to film „Próba ogniowa” („The Fireproof”) – film dostępny jest np. TUTAJ. Nawet jeśli oglądaliście ten film już wcześniej, nic nie stoi na przeszkodzie, aby zrobić to po raz kolejny. Dla wszystkiego jednak polecam jeszcze film Piosenka lub kolejne 2 z listy filmów dla małżeństw, o których pisałam wcześniej. […]
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Posted at 21:10h, 27 kwietniaA to zapraszam tutaj: http://mamysie.pl/najtansza-terapia-malzenska/ 🙂
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